Good things can happen.
Its been a while! Main reason I didn’t write was because there wasn’t even one full week at work. I was moving house, little holidays there and there and the time flies! All we know we will go for Christmas shopping soon!
Things been interesting lately. There were concerns and all sorts. Reading this book I thought oh look this is exactly us and oh yes we just went 2 steps back again! I finished the other book about Kanban which I believe I shared in previous notes and this one I thought will take me ages to read, but I need to say its on the top of my books that I already read. Maturity. Everybody understands it in so many different ways. But you know when it doesn’t work? When everyone ‘speaks’ different language. When everyone is not exactly on the same page. When things are not communicated from top down. And I was really glad these all things were brought up in our agreement meetings. We are just not there yet, but not very far away either. Changes are hard. Especially if its big changes that were not communicated very well. Even if you think sometimes that you gave all information away and you think that it reached everyone — sometimes its not a case and its good to repeat yourself few more times so its for sure clear what is going to happen.
I realised again that I should have been more proactive and stand the ground and do whatever needed instead of waiting for someone to approve. Sometimes shit happens and you have to stand up for everyone really and do things because simply no one else will do it. And every time I fail — I try to learn from it. I got really good support from all team and they been really nice and helpful and it felt good to know that I am not alone.
Knowledge and experience doesn’t ‘happen’ over night. And lets face it — woman in technology still is a ‘thing’. I actually heard something like that not long ago ‘you see, there was no man to stand the ground and make a decision’, ha! I will never agree that only man can make a decision, sorry, the most important is that the person who is having the last say would consider all options, have enough information on the table so the ‘right’ decision can be made. All I have is my books — reading reading and one more time reading and trying to learn every day. When you never really had a chance to do what you are doing today its always a challenge and I run in a lot of questions, especially when there is retro/agreement meeting its not always about technical stuff, but sometimes its just simply about how we should handle our daily processes so it would make sense and unfortunately I do not have yet that knowledge and confidence to say how Kanban works or how it should be and all that. But, let me finish my 25 books this year and who knows, I might be very close!
During this time as well one of my colleagues left. It was a very sad moment and a big loss. When I started Dave was the one who always asked if I am ok, maybe I need some help or if I just want to talk I can come to him. He helped me a lot. He was very good at giving advice and not only about work, but in general. So its different now and it took a while to get used to it, that he is not on holiday!
After moving house I am taking bus to work so I always have ‘dedicated’ time for reading my book which is really nice and I like the trip. I always thought it takes ages to get anywhere by bus, but actually its just a 35 min ride and I have to say its not enough if I want to read 25 books a year! I mean I am nearly half way there, 10 books done, 2 in progress so not as bad.
Overall its been interesting time. Feels a little bit like we are all on probation period, testing if it will work out ok the new changes and new challenges. The most important is to talk and be open. If you don’t bring the subject up — it might never be talked about and resolved. To be mature is not easy and it comes with a lot of failures, but as well good learnings.
Some people say dream big. Every time I try to ‘dream big’ everything goes very opposite! So I say, live, laugh, love and learn. From others, from yourself, from anything that you think its useful for you. And enjoy! If you still have something to learn and you feel that you are challenged — you are alive! If no — its time for you to go on a job hunt! Have a lovely weekend and life of course.
Oh oh and the new book which I just started today ‘Everybody Lies: Big Data, New Data, and What the Internet Can Tell Us About Who We Really Are’ looks really promising! Stuff that we normally don’t think about. People search for all sorts of things on internet — ALL SORTS. But would that be useful? I think so. To gather data about people searches does help to identify problems such as mental health. How we would be able to use it? Well there is all sorts of ways I guess. But just to understand how of a big issue is that would be a good first step. Using data like that our attention can actually be used towards resolving these problems or maybe thats a bit too strong — to improving current situation. Social media can damage us, but Big Data can turn it all around and help us.